Sunday, November 4, 2012

Raspberry: 19 Weeks

Dearest Raspberry,

Today was the first day that my pregnancy was noticed by someone who wasn't already aware of it. I feel like your presence has been visible for awhile now, but I'll concede that at this stage of the game, the obviousness of my "bump" is pretty dependent on what clothing I am wearing. I haven't yet gained any weight (to the chagrin of my OB, though she's not giving me a hard time about it like she did with your brother, since I've proved that I can grow big babies regardless), so I'm not looking much bigger yet, with the exception of the slowly expanding outward curve of my belly.

It's also often hard to know what other people are seeing and perceiving, because I know that many follow the same rule of thumb that I do: don't ever ask a woman if she's pregnant unless she's already in the process of giving birth. It's the best way to avoid unintended offense and hurt feelings. So, for all I know, many of my fellow choir members at rehearsal have had their suspicions, but have waited on me to say something to them. However, this evening, one brave soul approached and asked me if I was "eating for two." And I proudly said, "yes."

***

Every day since the sonogram, I've been replaying the moment that the tech turned the screen to me and showed me your face, in the midst of a yawn. Unlike so many noxious memories I have stored that come unbidden, despite my efforts to quell them, this one is welcome, and I could relive it ad infinitum. It brings great joy to my heart, every time.



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